Proposals signal the next stage of any relationships and some times, we get carried away with the razzmatazz of the proposal, that we fail to take the next necessary steps towards the real purpose of the proposal, which is the marriage itself. So you have recently proposed, or being prosed to, what should you do?
Right after the deed has been done, the first you should ask yourself as a lady is “Am I ready for this?” The truth of the matter is while you have to be ready for the D-Day physically, you also need to pay attention to your emotional health. At the point of the proposal, it might not have dawned on you that you are about to commit to spending the rest of your life with one person but that is exactly what you are saying yes to.
As a result of this, you need to be aware of everything you are doing from that moment onward, because directly or indirectly, you have begun planning for your own immediate family and setting the foundation upon which every other thing would ride.
As a man, you would have already made this decision before popping that question, hence this doesn’t apply to you. You would have thought about this and made your decision before going to your woman, so you have passed this stage.
If you and your partner haven’t talked about finance and kids. then this is the window period for you both to come to a compromise, and then figure out ways to overcoming misunderstandings in this regard. As an engaged couple, you to both begin to view the world from the same lens and come to an agreement on almost all matters, because this is what would make the transition much less overwhelming.
Being open-minded at this point, cannot be overemphasized, because you have both made commitments to always consider your better half in all things that affect your life, and knowing you both didn’t emerge from the background, or share the same ideals, then there should space for growth and accommodation of new perceptions, ideas, convictions, and others in that category.
Commitments must have been involved in the stage before the proposal, but guess what, you need more commitment, and it would definitely not get easier than this. You have committed to staying true to your partner, and being by their side every step of the way, Though you might argue that you both aren’t properly married yet, believe its a thing of mindset, so don’t think the priest pronouncing you both a couple would affect the level of commitment in the marriage if there wasn’t a foundation laid in the first place.
Lastly, breathe, breathe and breathe. This is not the time to freak, most especially if you both haven’t been married before. It is time to strengthen the bond and avoid unnecessary tension between the both of you. Emotional strength would also be needed to make plans for the wedding and ultimately the marriage, but in all of this, don’t lose the spark of love and friendship you both have for each other.
That’s one of the points of getting married right?
Jenny Soul is a passionate relationships expert, dating counselor and sales coach. She is also a songwriter, performer and mum. When she is not writing, she engages in counselling sessions and motivational speeches to young people.