Despite the fact that relationships do not promise beds of roses, it is also important to know that abusive relationships are also not to be considered. A relationship in most cases is a great breeding ground for positive change, as both partners try to bring out the best in each other.
As a result of the general imbalance in life and of course the society, we see a lot of people suffer abusive relationship and still remain in it for years, damaging their own psychological well being. A physical abusive is not necessarily the case here, as emotional abuse is also very rampant in relationships of today’s, and this affect both the lady and the guy.
While your partner might not fully express the extent of such abuse, you can feed off certain energy passed, and know exactly when its time to pack your bags and leave.
No one might complain about it, but no one likes to be manipulated in any situation. Manipulation is a dangerous game on the mind and can be expressed in varying degrees and levels. The moment you begin to manipulate your partner to do into things and situations that favour just you, then there is a big problem lurking around, and it suffices to say that such a relationship is only hanging by ropes, and would soon collapse.
If you notice that your partner begins to manipulate your moves emotionally, by making you feel guilty even when you are not wrong, then its time you consider exiting such an abusive relationship. The danger in this is that in the long run, you become a slave to their requests and needs, that you entirely ignore yours, and that can no longer be considered a relationship, but a slave activity.
Bear in mind that they might not even be aware of it, which is where you need to apply a bit of wisdom and discernment. Based on their kind of personality, right before you consider walking out the door, you can have a conversation around the subject and let them know what exactly is going on and see if you can both come to a resolution.
Do you know that distrust is also a form of emotional abuse? Well, now you do! If you constantly have to prove your sincerity to your partner at all times simply because they don’t trust, then its high time you left such a relationship. Relationships are about two people, who are willing to set aside their weaknesses and improve on each other’s strength to make things better, and if there is no trust on one side of the divide, then its as good as none at all.
Trust is a major component of a healthy relationship, and if you partner cannot expressly give you that credit, most especially if you haven’t given them a reason not to, then its might be a waste of time, and no one want their time wasted. You don’t have to always let them know that you are sincere in your actions, because this will eventually lead to a point where you no longer have faith in yourself, and before you might realise, it might be too late.
Faith is the foundation of every relationship, and if you don’t have faith in your partner, i.e the strong belief that they would get better as the days or years pass by, then do not waste your time or theirs hanging around, it would only lead to unnecessary complications and breed an abusive relationship.
If your partner doesn’t have faith in you, doesn’t believe on your dreams, doesn’t push you to be better at work, talks down at your weaknesses, etc, then you might as well leave the space for them to dwell in it alone. You should always aim to be a better version of yourself, in any relationship, and this takes teamwork, but what happens when your team member just doesn’t want to out in an effort to make you better? You leave.
You shouldn’t have to endure the trauma that this might cause to your emotional well being. Everyone in a relationship should be treated equally, and always remember the rule that says ‘Treat people the way you would love to be treated’ A case in point
Jenny Soul is a passionate relationships expert, dating counselor and sales coach. She is also a songwriter, performer and mum. When she is not writing, she engages in counselling sessions and motivational speeches to young people.