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Knowing When To End An Abusive Relationship

Jenny Soul by Jenny Soul
July 30, 2020
in Blog, Relationships
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Knowing When To End An Abusive Relationship
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Exiting an abusive relationshipDespite the fact that relationships do not promise beds of roses, it is also important to know that abusive relationships are also not to be considered. A relationship in most cases is a great breeding ground for positive change, as both partners try to bring out the best in each other. 

As a result of the general imbalance in life and of course the society, we see a lot of people suffer abusive relationship and still remain in it for years, damaging their own psychological well being. A physical abusive is not necessarily the case here, as emotional abuse is also very rampant in relationships of today’s, and this affect both the lady and the guy. 

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While your partner might not fully express the extent of such abuse, you can feed off certain energy passed, and know exactly when its time to pack your bags and leave. 

No one might complain about it, but no one likes to be manipulated in any situation. Manipulation is a dangerous game on the mind and can be expressed in varying degrees and levels. The moment you begin to manipulate your partner to do into things and situations that favour just you, then there is a big problem lurking around, and it suffices to say that such a relationship is only hanging by ropes, and would soon collapse. 

If you notice that your partner begins to manipulate your moves emotionally, by making you feel guilty even when you are not wrong, then its time you consider exiting such an abusive relationship. The danger in this is that in the long run, you become a slave to their requests and needs, that you entirely ignore yours, and that can no longer be considered a relationship, but a slave activity. 

Bear in mind that they might not even be aware of it, which is where you need to apply a bit of wisdom and discernment. Based on their kind of personality, right before you consider walking out the door, you can have a conversation around the subject and let them know what exactly is going on and see if you can both come to a resolution. abusive relationships

Do you know that distrust is also a form of emotional abuse?  Well, now you do! If you constantly have to prove your sincerity to your partner at all times simply because they don’t trust, then its high time you left such a relationship. Relationships are about two people, who are willing to set aside their weaknesses and improve on each other’s strength to make things better, and if there is no trust on one side of the divide, then its as good as none at all. 

Trust is a major component of a healthy relationship, and if you partner cannot expressly give you that credit, most especially if you haven’t given them a reason not to, then its might be a waste of time, and no one want their time wasted. You don’t have to always let them know that you are sincere in your actions, because this will eventually lead to a point where you no longer have faith in yourself, and before you might realise, it might be too late. 

Faith is the foundation of every relationship, and if you don’t have faith in your partner, i.e the strong belief that they would get better as the days or years pass by, then do not waste your time or theirs hanging around, it would only lead to unnecessary complications and breed an abusive relationship. 

If your partner doesn’t have faith in you, doesn’t believe on your dreams, doesn’t push you to be better at work, talks down at your weaknesses, etc, then you might as well leave the space for them to dwell in it alone. You should always aim to be a better version of yourself, in any relationship, and this takes teamwork, but what happens when your team member just doesn’t want to out in an effort to make you better? You leave. 

You shouldn’t have to endure the trauma that this might cause to your emotional well being. Everyone in a relationship should be treated equally, and always remember the rule that says ‘Treat people the way you would love to be treated’ A case in point

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Jenny Soul

Jenny Soul

Jenny Soul is a passionate relationships expert, dating counselor and sales coach. She is also a songwriter, performer and mum. When she is not writing, she engages in counselling sessions and motivational speeches to young people.

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Nigerian music industry is mourning the loss of one of its cultural giants. Alhaji Ismaila Dele Bello, popularly known as Ahuja Bello, passed away on Monday, August 25, 2025, at the age of 83. His son, Adetunji Bello, confirmed the sad news, revealing that the juju legend died peacefully in his sleep—just a day after celebrating his birthday. For many Nigerians, especially those who lived through the golden era of the 1970s and 1980s, the name Ahuja Bello evokes nostalgia. His music was the sound of celebration, a rhythm that echoed at weddings, naming ceremonies, and late-night parties. His passing is not only a personal loss for his family but also a cultural one for Nigeria’s rich musical heritage. Born on August 24, 1942, in Iseyin, Oyo State, Ahuja Bello was destined for music. Juju, a genre deeply rooted in Yoruba tradition, became the canvas on which he painted his artistry. Unlike many who treated music as a side hustle, Bello embraced it as a calling. By the mid-1970s, Bello had carved a niche for himself with his energetic stage performances, rich guitar work, and soulful lyrics. He was not just a performer; he was an experience. Fans adored his ability to connect with the crowd, blending traditional Yoruba rhythms with modern influences that kept his sound refreshing and timeless. Top 5 Most Visited Countries For Tourism Worldwide - JennySoul.com The 1970s and 1980s were a defining period for juju music, with legends like King Sunny Adé and Chief Ebenezer Obey dominating the scene. Yet, Ahuja Bello held his ground, building a loyal following that admired his originality and charisma. His concerts were more than entertainment—they were community gatherings. Every strum of his guitar carried messages of joy, resilience, and cultural pride. For many families, his songs became the soundtrack of their most memorable life events. One of the highlights of his career was his encounter with reggae icon Bob Marley during a trip to London. Though brief, this meeting symbolized the global relevance of Nigerian music long before the Afrobeats wave. Bello’s artistry showed that African sounds had the power to resonate beyond borders. Tragedy struck in 1982, when Ahuja Bello was involved in a serious accident. At the time, he was at the height of his career, commanding large crowds and dominating the juju scene. The accident slowed his performances and significantly altered his musical journey. For many musicians, such a setback might have marked the end. But Bello’s earlier contributions had already etched his name into Nigerian music history. Even though his stage appearances became limited, his influence continued. His recordings lived on, and his legacy inspired younger artists who admired his dedication to the craft. The death of Ahuja Bello is not just the passing of a man—it is the closing of a chapter in Nigeria’s musical story. His life represents an era when juju music carried social messages, celebrated culture, and served as a unifying force for communities. For older generations, Bello’s passing feels deeply personal. His music was woven into everyday life, from radio airwaves to live performances at social gatherings. For younger Nigerians, his story is a reminder of the roots of contemporary Nigerian music, proving that today’s Afrobeats giants stand on the shoulders of pioneers like him. As tributes pour in, fans, fellow musicians, and cultural associations describe Bello as a cultural custodian who never lost sight of his Yoruba identity. His songs celebrated resilience and tradition, ensuring that juju music remained relevant through the decades. Even in death, Bello’s music continues to breathe life into celebrations. His legacy shows that while people may pass, music remains immortal. Every strum of a juju guitar, every drumbeat at a Yoruba gathering, and every nostalgic radio replay will continue to carry Ahuja Bello’s spirit. The passing of Ahuja Bello at 83 is both a moment of mourning and a celebration of a life well lived. From Iseyin to international stages, from local dance halls to cultural milestones, Bello gave Nigerians more than music—he gave them memories. Though his journey was interrupted by tragedy, his impact remains unshaken. His career serves as a reminder that legacy is not measured by longevity alone but by the footprints left on culture. As Nigeria reflects on his contributions, one truth becomes clear: Ahuja Bello may have taken his final bow, but the music never ends. Rest in peace, Ahuja Bello. The juju lives on.
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