Here we go, on yet another torrid ride. Most relationships are not what they seem to be simply because we went into them with some preconceived relationship myths and notions, which then aided our easy fall into disappointments.
One thing you should know for sure is the fact that no two relationships are exactly the same, and if you have had a little experience in that area, you would agree that all your relationships, have had some unique points, even if you continually do the same things over and again.
It’s easy to fall prey to these relationship myths, without taking time to bust them because, one way or the other, society has made us comfortable with the idea of these things that should even normal anyway. It’s a good thing you have taken out time to find out a few of them, with the hope that you ultimately dispel them in your new or existing relationship.
#Myth 1- It Should Be Perfect: No, it shouldn’t, and yes you read it, it simply shouldn’t! There is no fun if the relationship is perfect, and as much as you may want to deny it, if it’s too close to perfect, you might get bored. Two people who love each other, don’t go into a relationship as perfect people, to do perfect things, rather they enter one to be a better version of themselves while helping their significant other be the best.
It is quite alarming that people have certain perfectionist ideals on what a relationship should look like, and they act on those fairy tale ideals when they eventually get into a relationship. It is good enough to have expectations about how good you want your partner to be but never enter a relationship thinking that everything you expect would come to pass, at least room to work on certain shortcomings, failures, and disappointments.
#Myth 2- It MUST Last Forever: News flash, nothing lasts forever, and the same applies to relationships. Don’t get it twisted, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t love your partner, or go about thinking of the day it will eventually end, but never think that things would remain at status quo forever. It is never guaranteed.
Busting these relationship myths would give room for growth, and a lot of forgiveness, because although you are giving your best to the relationship, you are also aware that you don’t control the universe, hence things Might go wrong in between. There are couples that have only known each other from the time they were wise enough to made decisions on relationships, so you might want to consider putting everything in scale and on a balance.
#Myth 3- No Physical Intimacy, No Love: This is the 21st century, and it’s high time we abandoned this age-long baggage of linking true feelings to intercourse. Though love and physical intimacy are co-dependent, they are also individual concepts that need to be treated as such. You can have intercourse with a person and still not love them, and though the vice of that would be difficult, it is very well possible, based on mutual understanding.
There is no need to cause yourself a lifetime of regrets or disappointment, hence it is best you do away with such notions. Don’t go about thinking someone is in love with you simply because they want to intimate with you, it could be lust or a temporary overwhelming feeling, so you might want to hold on, and cool off on that for a while.
#Myth 4- You Must Be Heartbroken At Least Once: This is one of the relationship myths that is as old as time itself, and its time to leave this perception behind. it is possible to have been on a love train and never gotten your heart broken! Relationships are not war zine, hence it is not necessary to keep thinking you are in a constant battle with your partner, instead, the major goal is to win and conquer together.
Although heartbreaks are inevitable in some situations and circumstances, you really do not need to subject yourself to such torture, most especially if you keep pondering upon it, and acting it out in your head. Thinking about when your heart will be broken wouldn’t still ease the pain, peradventure it happens, so why the worry?
#Myth 5- It Should Be Love At First Sight: Yeah, yeah, we have Hollywood and a couple of other Woods to thank for this myth. Have you considered yourself a special being, a special force, with a peculiar identity? If you have then you would know that love happens anytime, and in various unconventional ways.
Don’t play yourself thinking that you have to fall in love with someone in a certain way, or do certain things to make the love perfect. Love is a mystery, hence, we cannot fully grasp its operation. The best way you can do this is by being openminded about a lot of things, and while you do that, watch LOVE slip into your laps like a melting piece of butter.
What other relationship myths are you familiar with?
Jenny Soul is a passionate relationships expert, dating counselor and sales coach. She is also a songwriter, performer and mum. When she is not writing, she engages in counselling sessions and motivational speeches to young people.