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Reasons why married men and women cheat

Jenny Soul by Jenny Soul
October 14, 2020
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Cheating is more common than expected in committed relationships. There are different reports that have constantly confirmed that men are more prone to cheating. However, what people might find hard to believe is that women cheat as much as men in relationships. Relationships are complex, and not one cap fits all. Two people with different backgrounds coming to live together, is not as easy as it sounds. Cheating in a relationship is a proof that something is either wrong with the relationship or the cheater.


It is 2020 and one thing you should know is that there are different reasons why people cheat on their partners. When a spouse cheats in a marriage, it may lead to different problems. Even the happiest marriage can be affected when one of the partners engages in extramarital affairs. It is left for the two partners to talk about their expectations whether they will like to stay married anymore or not.

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One of the major factors that cause cheating in a relationship is loneliness. Some other factors include alcohol, pressure, boredom, lust, etc. We will discuss them in detail later in this post. Sometimes, married people get into flings and some even become full-blown affairs that could last for years. Some spouses seek outsiders for what they cannot get from their partners. It could be an emotional or physical need. There are different reasons why married men and women cheat.


Why do married men and women cheat?
You will be surprised when know the number of marriages that have gone through the experience cheating. No matter how it sounds, infidelity is not uncommon. There are various reasons why partners cheat in a relationship. This post is going to talk about the common ones.


Inability to keep a monogamous relationship
No matter how it sounds, some individuals are not used to keep only one partner in a relationship. No matter what you do or how you try to prevent such partners, they cannot remain faithful to one partner. Partners built like this will try to justify their actions by explaining that they are not born to be with one single person. This kind of spouse cannot stay faithful to his or her partner. This is a finding you need to make before going onto marriage. A person who cherishes monogamy and someone who does not do so may not be able to stay together.


Narcissistic tendencies
Sometimes cheaters may possess some qualities of a narcissist. Such people are selfish, and only think about themselves. They do not think about the effect of their actions on their partner and children. All they care about is how their actions will benefit them.


Lack of communication
Another major reason why married people cheat is lack of communication. There are different things that could cause this for example, period of nursing a child, or financial difficulties. This can affect communication between couples. Inability to express their desires to one another may make them seek it somewhere else. It is very important for married people to establish an easy channel of communication. Your partner should be free to talk to you and explain their fears and desires. There is no reason to grow apart.


Pornography
Pornography is not healthy for a great marriage. If your partner is addicted to pornographic images or videos, it could cause him or her to cheat.


Boredom
Sometimes marriage may become boring, especially with the presence of kids. This happens mostly to people who get married for the wrong reasons. They will find it difficult to keep up with the spark, and it may get them stuck in situations they don’t have any control over. In addition, the cheating partner might be seeking a thrill outside of matrimony.


Insecurity
A man or woman that has been married for a long time might begin to worry that they are not keeping up with life. This could make them seek out other people that will make them feel young and wanted. Sometimes cheaters might have a low self-esteem.


Peer Pressure
It is only a matter of time, a person who keeps cheaters as friends may likely cheat. They will want to keep up with their friends and show that they can also be desirable. It does not matter how old you are, bad company can corrupt the mind. However, if your partner has possesses self-control then he or she may hold on to their values.


Choice
The hardest thing to believe is that your partner is hurting you as a choice. The truth is that, sometimes there is no reason why they are cheating. They just choose to cheat and there is nothing their partners can do to stop them
Factors that could cause cheating
Cheating is an act that could destroy any marriage. There are different factors that could increase the chance of your partner cheating on you which include:


Exposure as a child
A person who is exposed to a lot of infidel acts right from childhood may see cheating as a normal act. Children who watch their parents whenever they are engaged in sexual activities may see it as a norm.


Addiction
If your partner is addicted to drugs, alcohol, sex, and so on, there is every tendency that they will cheat. Someone who is addicted to alcohol might cheat if they are drunk. A sex addict who has not sought help might find it difficult to be in a committed relationship.


Trauma
A person that has experienced any physical, mental or sexual trauma has a high probability of cheating on their partner. The solution to this is to seek help to resolve the trauma.


Disorder
If your partner has personality disorders, they have the likelihood of cheating. Someone with narcissistic tendencies or bipolar disorder might cheat on their spouse.


Once a cheater
A person who has been involved in cheating may not stop doing so no matter what. Cheaters are more likely to have problems staying in a committed relationship.


Conclusion
There are different reasons why married men and women cheat on their spouses. If your partner is cheating on you, try to communicate with them in order to get to the root cause so you could be able to profer a solution.

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Jenny Soul

Jenny Soul

Jenny Soul is a passionate relationships expert, dating counselor and sales coach. She is also a songwriter, performer and mum. When she is not writing, she engages in counselling sessions and motivational speeches to young people.

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Nigerian music industry is mourning the loss of one of its cultural giants. Alhaji Ismaila Dele Bello, popularly known as Ahuja Bello, passed away on Monday, August 25, 2025, at the age of 83. His son, Adetunji Bello, confirmed the sad news, revealing that the juju legend died peacefully in his sleep—just a day after celebrating his birthday. For many Nigerians, especially those who lived through the golden era of the 1970s and 1980s, the name Ahuja Bello evokes nostalgia. His music was the sound of celebration, a rhythm that echoed at weddings, naming ceremonies, and late-night parties. His passing is not only a personal loss for his family but also a cultural one for Nigeria’s rich musical heritage. Born on August 24, 1942, in Iseyin, Oyo State, Ahuja Bello was destined for music. Juju, a genre deeply rooted in Yoruba tradition, became the canvas on which he painted his artistry. Unlike many who treated music as a side hustle, Bello embraced it as a calling. By the mid-1970s, Bello had carved a niche for himself with his energetic stage performances, rich guitar work, and soulful lyrics. He was not just a performer; he was an experience. Fans adored his ability to connect with the crowd, blending traditional Yoruba rhythms with modern influences that kept his sound refreshing and timeless. Top 5 Most Visited Countries For Tourism Worldwide - JennySoul.com The 1970s and 1980s were a defining period for juju music, with legends like King Sunny Adé and Chief Ebenezer Obey dominating the scene. Yet, Ahuja Bello held his ground, building a loyal following that admired his originality and charisma. His concerts were more than entertainment—they were community gatherings. Every strum of his guitar carried messages of joy, resilience, and cultural pride. For many families, his songs became the soundtrack of their most memorable life events. One of the highlights of his career was his encounter with reggae icon Bob Marley during a trip to London. Though brief, this meeting symbolized the global relevance of Nigerian music long before the Afrobeats wave. Bello’s artistry showed that African sounds had the power to resonate beyond borders. Tragedy struck in 1982, when Ahuja Bello was involved in a serious accident. At the time, he was at the height of his career, commanding large crowds and dominating the juju scene. The accident slowed his performances and significantly altered his musical journey. For many musicians, such a setback might have marked the end. But Bello’s earlier contributions had already etched his name into Nigerian music history. Even though his stage appearances became limited, his influence continued. His recordings lived on, and his legacy inspired younger artists who admired his dedication to the craft. The death of Ahuja Bello is not just the passing of a man—it is the closing of a chapter in Nigeria’s musical story. His life represents an era when juju music carried social messages, celebrated culture, and served as a unifying force for communities. For older generations, Bello’s passing feels deeply personal. His music was woven into everyday life, from radio airwaves to live performances at social gatherings. For younger Nigerians, his story is a reminder of the roots of contemporary Nigerian music, proving that today’s Afrobeats giants stand on the shoulders of pioneers like him. As tributes pour in, fans, fellow musicians, and cultural associations describe Bello as a cultural custodian who never lost sight of his Yoruba identity. His songs celebrated resilience and tradition, ensuring that juju music remained relevant through the decades. Even in death, Bello’s music continues to breathe life into celebrations. His legacy shows that while people may pass, music remains immortal. Every strum of a juju guitar, every drumbeat at a Yoruba gathering, and every nostalgic radio replay will continue to carry Ahuja Bello’s spirit. The passing of Ahuja Bello at 83 is both a moment of mourning and a celebration of a life well lived. From Iseyin to international stages, from local dance halls to cultural milestones, Bello gave Nigerians more than music—he gave them memories. Though his journey was interrupted by tragedy, his impact remains unshaken. His career serves as a reminder that legacy is not measured by longevity alone but by the footprints left on culture. As Nigeria reflects on his contributions, one truth becomes clear: Ahuja Bello may have taken his final bow, but the music never ends. Rest in peace, Ahuja Bello. The juju lives on.
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